TheNextStep
TX BBQ > KC BBQ
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2006
- Messages
- 15,311
- Reaction score
- 32,517
1. I had to set up an instagram account because while Teeg and I take a million pictures on gameday, we rarely get to see them. People are like “can I tag you” and I’m thinking “I don’t even know what the fuck that means.” So, anyway, I set it up a few days ago and… Jesus H Fucking Christ, I hate Instagram. Stop suggesting all of this bullshit! Why the fuck do people see an instagram video of somebody eating a giant fucking chalupa and think, “watching this seems like a good investment of my time?” And who is watching all of these bullshit “Four realities you need to accept by the time you’re 40” accounts? How did you make it this far in life and still end up so goddamned lost that this is quality content to you? And for a country that is predominantly obese, why are there so many freaking “best places to go hiking” accounts? Stop it. You are never going to fucking that trail or any other. And every other “post” is just another ad anyway. What a shit-fuck horrible fucking platform. Social media sucks.
2. I volunteered to coach the grandson’s youth basketball team this year. There are 9 kids, in third or fourth grade. Tonight is our first practice. My coaching experience? Zero. Nada. Nothing. So… should be fun! (I’m terrified!)
3. Watched that “Curious Case of Natalia Grace” series and all I have to say is that they’re all fucking assholes. No exceptions. Every last one of them is crazy and every last one of them should be pushed down a well. I’d even shoot Lassie to make sure nobody saves them and I like Lassie.
4. Can we just hurry up and announce AP as the coach already? We’ve satisfied the Rooney Rule and AP sure speaks and acts like somebody who knows he has the job. Just cut the suspense already.
5. Same goes for Champ Kelly. You have Champ in the room for all of the coaching interviews but maybe you’re going to hire somebody else? Come on, Mark.
6. Oh, I had to come up with a character name since I made the instagram account. For three years, people have asked me, “what’s your character name?” For three years, I’ve said, “Scott.” For three years, they have unanimously responded “that’s a shitty character name.” So now I had to make one and I feel corny as hell about it, don’t like it, and will still tell people to call me “Scott.”
7. I recently discovered that I’ve been wrong about Five Finger Death Punch all these years. I initially hated them because the first song I heard from them was their spectacularly less-than-average cover of “Bad Company.” Fucking up Paul Rodgers put them on my shit list. And then, when the song became a hit, I hated them even more for it. As it turns out, they’re pretty good. That cover still sucks though.
8. Speaking of shitty music, though, my grandson’s favorite is a guy called Polo G. We found this out because we have taken him to a couple of concerts and decided to ask him if there were any concerts he’d like to go to this year. “Polo G” was his answer. So Teeg and I were hanging out the other night and decided to give it a listen. Fuck me, man. Guess which concert I’m never taking him to? Just horrible. And, hey, when did it become cool for rappers to sing about crushing depression in monotone voices? Did they all get together and decide on this? Put down the mic and go to rehab and group therapy you sad ass, talentless fucks.
9. I really need to rein in my language or I reckon I won’t be coaching youth basketball very long.
10. I hate this time of year. I’ve already read “reports” that the Raiders are interested in trading for Dak Prescott, that they might trade Maxx Crosby for Justin Fields, and all kinds of other stupid shit. Listen, the only time incredibly dumbass trades go through in real life is when the Broncos need a quarterback. Thank you. I’ll be here all week. Don’t forget to tip your waiter.
2. I volunteered to coach the grandson’s youth basketball team this year. There are 9 kids, in third or fourth grade. Tonight is our first practice. My coaching experience? Zero. Nada. Nothing. So… should be fun! (I’m terrified!)
3. Watched that “Curious Case of Natalia Grace” series and all I have to say is that they’re all fucking assholes. No exceptions. Every last one of them is crazy and every last one of them should be pushed down a well. I’d even shoot Lassie to make sure nobody saves them and I like Lassie.
4. Can we just hurry up and announce AP as the coach already? We’ve satisfied the Rooney Rule and AP sure speaks and acts like somebody who knows he has the job. Just cut the suspense already.
5. Same goes for Champ Kelly. You have Champ in the room for all of the coaching interviews but maybe you’re going to hire somebody else? Come on, Mark.
6. Oh, I had to come up with a character name since I made the instagram account. For three years, people have asked me, “what’s your character name?” For three years, I’ve said, “Scott.” For three years, they have unanimously responded “that’s a shitty character name.” So now I had to make one and I feel corny as hell about it, don’t like it, and will still tell people to call me “Scott.”
7. I recently discovered that I’ve been wrong about Five Finger Death Punch all these years. I initially hated them because the first song I heard from them was their spectacularly less-than-average cover of “Bad Company.” Fucking up Paul Rodgers put them on my shit list. And then, when the song became a hit, I hated them even more for it. As it turns out, they’re pretty good. That cover still sucks though.
8. Speaking of shitty music, though, my grandson’s favorite is a guy called Polo G. We found this out because we have taken him to a couple of concerts and decided to ask him if there were any concerts he’d like to go to this year. “Polo G” was his answer. So Teeg and I were hanging out the other night and decided to give it a listen. Fuck me, man. Guess which concert I’m never taking him to? Just horrible. And, hey, when did it become cool for rappers to sing about crushing depression in monotone voices? Did they all get together and decide on this? Put down the mic and go to rehab and group therapy you sad ass, talentless fucks.
9. I really need to rein in my language or I reckon I won’t be coaching youth basketball very long.
10. I hate this time of year. I’ve already read “reports” that the Raiders are interested in trading for Dak Prescott, that they might trade Maxx Crosby for Justin Fields, and all kinds of other stupid shit. Listen, the only time incredibly dumbass trades go through in real life is when the Broncos need a quarterback. Thank you. I’ll be here all week. Don’t forget to tip your waiter.
