John Shoop

R4Life

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Being an interested fan, I decide to google John Shoop and learn a bit more about our new OC. The first hit on Google is a website: www.firejohnshoop.com.
Not that it's unusual to have a site as a coach in the NFL, but I've never seen them come up on the top ten, much less #1.

Let's see what he can do first, but here's an excerpt from the site moderator,

"John Shoop is a fantastic Offensive Coordinator. By fantastic, I mean horrible. He couldn't move the football against a high school team.

John Shoop has wanted to coach football since he was in 7th grade. Like all boys his age he imagined his team losing game after game because his offense was about as daring as The Cowardly Lion. Just think of the comedy potential if John Shoop was the Detroit Lions Offensive Coordinator. And just think of how much better the Bears would be if that were the case. Depressing, isn't it?

John graduated from the University of the South (Sewanee) in 1991, where he played quarterback for 4 seasons. Sewanee athletic records are hard to come by, but I'd be surprised if Shoop ever completed a pass longer than 20 yards. Do you want to be the Bears next offensive coordinator? Become an athletic prospect at Sewanee or whatever they call themselves. Make sure to tell them that you know John Shoop.

Shoop learned a lot at Sewanee, saying, "Those are the lessons I learned at Sewanee. Work and care are the only two things you can control.� I'm not sure what that means, but it's clear that John is wrong. If the Bears care more than the other team, and work harder, then maybe Shoop is calling bad plays. It's also Shoop's fault if they don't care more than the other team and don't work hard.

After leaving Sewanee, Shoop spent 4 seasons working as a volunteer and graduate assistant for bad college teams (Dartmouth and Vanderbilt) before becoming the offensive quality control coach and later quarterbacks coach for a bad NFL team. Since January 22, 2001, Shoop has been the Offensive Coordinator of the Chicago Bears. I think the question here is, where is the Bears offensive quality control coach on this one? In fact, the quality control coach is Charlie Coiner, who is much more qualified than John Shoop, but this is firejohnshoop.com, not firejohnshoophirecharliecoiner.com. Sorry, Charlie. "
 
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well, I guess its akin to choosing between eating Rosie O'Donnell's pussy or fingering Hillary Clinton - one's dog ugly and the other's dog ugly and ancient
 
Raiders_Rock said:
well, I guess its akin to choosing between eating Rosie O'Donnell's pussy or fingering Hillary Clinton - one's dog ugly and the other's dog ugly and ancient

WHAT???
:eek:

that may be the most disturbing thing I ever read here.....and also hilarious......
 
Of Course I had to go to frie John Shoop.com and I found this..........
Just substitute our guys names in for these

There is much evidence to support the firing of John Shoop. Consider this: Football teams in today's NFL typically script their first 15 plays. The Bears are no exception. Shoop says, “I script the entire thing. I have the first fifteen plays written down to feel out the defense and we’ll do some different personnel groupings. From those fifteen plays, you can find the path that the other team is figuring out. We do a good job of sticking to our game plan.” I'm having a hard time figuring out the path that Shoop is finding out that the other team is figuring out, but we at FireJohnShoop.com have found what appears to be a good first 15 plays.


1. Anthony Thomas up the middle.
2. Lateral to Dez White and hope he doesn't fumble.
3. Wide receiver screen, typically good for half the yards needed for a first down.
4. Punt. Pause here to figure out what the other team is figuring out.
5. Anthony Thomas up the middle.
6. False start.
7. Play action, check down to Anthony Thomas in the back field.
8. Fake a draw. Run a Kordell keeper behind the decoy.
9. Wide receiver screen again, it has to work this time.
10. Punt. Hope Maynard gets off a good one this time.
11. Throw deep to Marty Booker to try to climb out of 14-0 hole.
11. Anthony Thomas up the middle.
12. Fumbleruski.
13. Anthony Thomas up the middle.
14. Punt again.
15. Go deep for a score, but only if there is less than 2 minutes left in the half.

If we start the first 15 plays like this I may die laughing!!!!
 
The funny thing is, that's about what Houston did last Sunday.
 
I like the quotes as you reload the page at firejohnshoop. This one is my favorite.

"I don't care if we had gotten shut out. I don't care if we wouldn't have gained a yard, I promise you … there's going to be the same plays in the future."
 
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